To The Hilton

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Lately I have found myself wandering over to Perez Hilton to gawk at the tawdry, unseemly gossip, rumor, and innuendo that oozes gloriously through every pinkly-glowing pore on the site. Actually, in all honesty, I go there every single day, and no amount of bathing or counseling can make the shame peel away.

Perez Hilton is one of the true success stories in the blogging world; his site averages nearly four million hits A DAY. He built this massive promotional and money-making machine over the course of one year while sitting in a coffee shop because he couldn't afford internet in his apartment. The VERY openly gay and pudgy Perez, through snarky antics and tireless work, made himself such a success that his Frankenberry face showed up as host of MTV's New Year's Eve telecast. Amazing.

I drew all over that picture of Perez because that is what he's famous for: drawing cum and/or cocaine in the mouths and nostrils of celebrities, especially those in the closet, like Wentworth Miller. Take this, for example:
While I do find much humor in what the guy does, the public outing of celebrities is unacceptable. As a gay man himself, Hilton should know better than to publicly harass and out famous people who are obviously not comfortable with melding their sexuality and their professional lives.

Hilton has made a good living out of trashing our celebrity trash, and I have become one of the addicted masses. Like heroin or McDonald's, Perez Hilton is a habit, and one that I will probably shamefully crave until the day it kills me.

I hate myself.